Why Do We Say “Can’t”?
This thought is not new or original, but let this post act as an encouragement and a reminder. The concept of "can't" in our vernacular should be all but forgotten, because we can! In almost every environment I enter where there is discord over quality, or vision, there is a culture of "can't", when in fact they can. "I can't learn that software, I can't change my ways, I can't make the deadline or that meeting….I can't." But the truth is we can. For some, if not all, it is not an easy road to the result associated with the "can", but the first step is almost always simple and somewhat easy: To decide I can. I will. More often than not I can't can be translated "I won't", but we don't say "I won't" because it exposes the child within who is having a tantrum. Now the tantrum in a child may be caused by the fear of the unknown, but it exposes the truth, we can, but we won't. Here is the truth, you can be more kind to everyone in your life, you can grow your business, or even start one, you can finish that project, or start it, you can be more and you will, with one change in your internal culture. Start saying I can. Literally find ways to say "I can", and stop saying the other. Two caveats:
- There is such a thing as boundaries in life and in work, times that we need to find a way to say "I won't", but that is the subject for another post;
- There are those who have impediments to "I can" that most of us cannot comprehend, and we must have grace for them – they actually can't; however, I might add that more often than not when I run into those with disabilities they put the rest of us to shame. Their "I can" existence is worn in their smile, in their accomplishments, and causes them to accomplish comparatively more with their resources than we ever do with ours.
So please….You Can.